Don't 'Honey' Me.

Most people whom we haven't known long (or are meeting for the first time) assume that Owen is Seth's. And don't get me wrong, Owen is Seth's. I mean, he's totally Seth's kid. Like, did you ever do something totally buckwild when you were a child and your mother just looked at your father and said, "Can you deal with your daughter?" Keyword 'your.' As if she wasn't owning you in that moment. And the same holds true when you were being good - "Oh yes, she's her father's child, she's got him wrapped around her finger." Are you following? I hope so. Because that's what I mean by Owen is Seth's. Owen may not have half of Seth's DNA, but Owen is definitely Seth's child. When O is being sassy, Seth knows how to deal with him and calm him down. When he wants to cuddle and be silly it's Seth's lap he crawls in.

I say all of this so that you can understand that Owen adores Seth so much that he's unintentionally turned into a mini-Seth. He talks like Seth, he has Seth's mannerisms and perhaps the cutest thing is…he has Seth's sense of humor and can tell a joke/tease you with a straight face like Seth is renowned for doing. And to see that in a five year old is hysterical.

Now for a little more background to set-up the story I'm about to tell you: 

In our house, if the kids want dessert before bedtime they need to eat a certain amount of their 'food' aka 'dinner.' Also, let's say it's almost lunchtime and they tell us they are hungry, we respond with, "What do you want to eat?" And the kids say something like, "Cheetos." We respond with, "It's almost lunch, and Cheetos aren't food; they're a dessert, so pick some real food." 

Note our use of 'food.'

Also, in our house we each have a slew of nicknames. From the obvious shortening of our given names, to the tradition pet-names, to the silly inside joke nicknames. One pet-name we don't use in our house is 'honey.' I HATE it. I don't know why. It's totally irrational on my part, but I cringe every time I hear couples call one another 'honey.' It's not that I think it's sappy, I call Seth tons of sappy things, I actually think it's the opposite - I think calling you're romantic partner 'honey' sounds like you don't like them. As if you're trying to call them something sweet and the best you could do was 'honey.' As bizarre as it is, when I hear people call each other 'honey' I think, "Oh shit, their relationship is on the rocks and their trying to pretend their okay." You know, now that I'm thinking about it, I may look at the word 'honey' this way because when I'm in bitch-mode and annoyed with someone of no relation to me the following words typically roll of my tongue without even thinking, "Listen, honey….." So there we have it, see what you all just did? You helped me talk through this ridiculous annoyance I have with people calling their loved ones 'honey' and because of that I discovered why I view the word the way I do. Who woulda thought this would turn into a counseling session for myself?

Moving on.

Seth and the kids know how I hate 'honey,' but we say it every blue moon when we are being smartasses with each other.

Now that you have enough background to write a thesis on our family I'll get to the point:

So we're Skyping with our little guy a few weeks ago and we're playing 'kitchen,' where we order food and Owen cooks it and serves it to us. He looks at me and says, "Mommy, what kind of food do you want? What's your favorite food?" 

I reply simply with, "Spaghetti." 

Owen whips up some make-believe spaghetti and move on to Seth to ask, "Daddy, what's your favorite food?"  

"Chocolate," says Seth.

Owen looks Seth square in the eye and says (with a straight face), "Sorry honey, that's not food, that's dessert!"

Is that not the funniest shit ever? What a clever little guy at the tender age of five. 

Then again, he didn't have much of a choice but to be a jokester when shenanigans like this go on in our house on a daily basis:

Do you see more of yourself or your spouse/partner in your kiddos? What do you think determines who they are most like? Ethan is most like me, Owen like Seth, and Ari is a combo. And are we the only family that can play on Photo Booth for an hour straight and stop only because our stomach muscles hurt from all the laughter?

Later honey,

Lor