Kid Convos (and a few adult ones too)...

And here we are with yet another post of funny shit my kids say and I write down. I'm gonna have a bookcase full of these by the time the littlest heads off to college. Enjoy.

Owen (after I kicked him and Ethan outside to play because they had been playing video games for about two hours straight): Mom? You know how Ethan made the mistake of teaching me video games? Well, I've decided not to teach the baby video games."

Owen: I don't do that to people anymore, it's cruel.

Ariana (When telling me about an Army veteran she saw on TV): So this guy was a veterinary solider...

Owen: He grabs a crow bar and tries to crow it open.

Owen (with a look of pure disgust on his face): Does all British music sound like this?

Owen (often adds/omits words to phrases...in this case 'Long time, no see'. I asked if he wanted to go to the store with me and he began telling me how he was too busy.): ...basically mom, no time, no see.

Owen: They're called cuties because they're made for me and I'm a cutie.

Owen (When waiting to board our flight to England): This is my last time in America for a while. Now it's off to different countries and different languages. It's gonna be a long time before I deploy again. *slowly shakes head as if reminiscing 

Ariana's invisible friend, Bob, died so her and Anna were out having a ceremony for him. 
Owen: Are they doing Bob's funeral?
Ethan: Yeah
O: Wow, that's sad and awkward at the same time...how did Bob die again?
E: She scared him to death
O: So basically she murdered him. She needs charged with 1st degree murder. 

Owen (after demolishing ribs): If I'm messy, don't judge.

I procrastinate and I'm very scatter-brained. Knowing this, the morning I was flying out and about to head out the door to the airport Seth ran down a mental checklist with me to make sure I had everything I needed to head back to the states to pick up the kids.
Seth:What about your passport? Do you have your passport?
Me: Oh! I should grab that. *walks toward office*
Seth: LORRI! (he never calls me that) YOU ARE GOING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY! YOU NEED YOUR PASSPORT!

Seth: Ready to go?
Me: I still have an entire glass of wine to finish *leans back in no rush*
Seth: Well you better down that bullshit because we're leaving in like five mike.

For more shenanigans go here, here, here, here, here, and if you're curious as to how and why I started this Kid Convo Chaos read all about that here. Dueces, homeskillets!