Funny Shit My Kids Say

Are you ready for another round of Funny Shit My Kids Say? Well too bad, cause it's happenin'. Now.


Ariana:
- (To her brothers roughhousing in a store) We're in public. You gotta act normal.

- (After using eBay for the first time and loving it) I think I'm gonna be one of those awkward eBay people when I grow up. Who sits all day waiting...just waiting for their package to arrive.

Ariana: He (Owen) has to go pee every five minutes.
Owen: 10 - actually!

- It smells like poop...or french fries.


Owen:
- (To Ari when she stopped in the middle of telling a story) Tell us more about the falcon bullet - this is starrrrrting to get interesting.

- (When shopping for school supplies)
Me: Here Owen. Here are some dinosaur folders.
Owen: (Doesn't even look up and continues to look through the bins) I'm not a fan of dinosaurs anymore.

- That sucks that people get pick-pocketed. That's probably how hobos become hobo'd. 

Owen: I'm gonna get some milk
Me: Here, let me help you.
Owen: I can do it. I'm a grown man now.

Ariana: She works at the (insert company name).
Owen: Probably because she didn't have a high enough IP.
Me: IP?
Ethan: He means 'IQ'.
Ariana: Wow. Who doesn't have the high enough IQ now?

Me: Owen, do you still want me to cut you a piece of cake for your snack?
Owen: Nah, I already had something else. I got unpatient.

Owen: I'll give you a thousand dollars if you do it.
Ethan: You don't have a thousand dollars.
O: Well when I get it I'll give it to you. Like when I'm 16. And get a job. And graduate college.

Owen: Mommy can I live with you until I'm at least 30. Because I'm afraid I might get in my car to go to the grocery store and get lost, never to be found again.

For more shenanigans, go here.